This past week I turned 31 years old, a very odd age to me. For whatever reason the prospect of being a “31 year old” doesn’t feel real, it feels like a made up age with a made up number. Maybe it’s because the number isn’t evenly rounded like “30,35,etc.” but even when looking at numbers & ages like 32, 33, & 34, they seem realistic which has lead me to believe that the reason the age “31” feels so foreign to me as a concept is due to its prime nature.
As far back as I can remember, the number “13” has been lucky for me. Prime, in its own right, I found myself claimed by the number “13” at a very young age. When I was growing up on & playing team sports jerseys were often delegated by number. One would go to the smallest member of the team then the numbers would ascend as did the height of those involved with the team. I was always a tall kid, in fact I earned the monicker of the ‘jolly green giant’ in fourth or fifth grade from a kid, Nick, in my class because of my stature, demeanor, & tendency towards often adorning myself in the color green. So due to my lofty height I was always given the longest jersey, the first of which bore the “13.”
If you haven’t picked up on the flip yet, 13 backwards is 31, my lucky number has pulled an Uno reverse on this milestone year of my life & much like my much loved teen numeral & its unique ability to only be divisible by itself, the year before me seems mysterious but brimming with possibilities.
They say to create the future you want you have to live in a perpetual state of the unknown. You cannot expect different results going forward if you’ve already written your future to be; wake up at this time, eat these things, go to this place, go to that place, work here, eat there, etc. etc. & maybe that’s why the possibilities of this year seem so exciting to me.
The mysteries of the universe aside, the year in question also traditionally marks a year of “expansion,” of broadening horizons & coming into ones own & the thought of that excites me! You see I dreaded turning 30, I did, I didn’t want to leave my 20s behind, especially after I felt the latter years of which had been stolen from me by COVID, but there’s something different about this.
You would think plunging deeper into my 30s would terrify me, when I think, in reality, it invigorates me. I spent too much time in my 30th year afraid of aging when in reality I needed to take the time to understand just how much of a privilege aging is, it’s not something that all of us get. Years are not a given, you’re never guaranteed a tomorrow & it took me far too long to accept the gift I was being given that was the gift of endless possibility.
I’m so beyond excited to see what this year holds, I can’t begin to fathom the amazing experiences the future holds & I promise you all that I will do my best to live each of these moments with the utmost gratitude & appreciation for the time that I’ve been given.
As always, much love to you all!
-C