LGBTQ

Blog: Pride Month, Straight Pride, & Being an LGBTQ+ Ally

First off…

HAPPY PRIDE!!!!!

Whether you’re gay, lesbian, bisexual, transexual, asexual, omnisexual, demisexual, pansexual, queer, non-binary, gender fluid, questioning, a straight ally, or any other identity under the LGBTQ+ mantle; Happy Pride!!!

For those of you that don’t know, June is Pride Month, a month of the year where we shift the lens to focus on those members of our society & our history that are/were LGBTQ+. Pride month exists to draw attention to the marginalized, not to boast one sexuality being greater than another. Pride month exists as a time for celebrating what makes us different, what makes us human, what binds us all; love, or rather love in all of its forms. It also exists as a tool for helping to educate the ignorant & normalize other types of sexualities & genders other than straight or cis. The goal of pride is to show that we don’t live in a world that’s black & white, we live in a world that is a rainbow of millions of different lifestyles & ways to love. Pride month not only is meant as a way to celebrate our differences but is also a way to celebrate the love that we all are capable of sharing & the acceptance we all desire to have.

Now, this year, like most years, there’s a huge push for a “straight pride month” or a “straight pride parade” which I find absolutely ridiculous. For starters, no one is stopping you from attending pride. No where on any LGBTQ+ organization will you find “straights not allowed” (the same can’t be said for the inverse) because again, pride is all about inclusion. The LGBTQ+ community actually encourages straight allies; people within the societal normal that affirm members of the LGBTQ+ community that they are not alone, that they have value to society, that they are deserving of love & acceptance. The main reason that straight pride is insanity is the fact that being straight does not come with the fear of persecution, it does not come with the fear of being beaten on the street for holding your partner’s hand, it does not come with the fear of losing your job when your boss finds out your sexual orientation, it does not come with the fear of being ostracized by your friends & family, it does not come with the fear of “I love you, but,” it does not come with the fear of being kicked out or shut out because you’re different. Being straight is, and has been for thousands of years, the societal norm. That’s changing, slowly, but straight is still, as they say, “the default.” Straight pride is unnecessary, illogical, & if I’m being honest a downright pathetic attempt to reclaim what is believed to be lost ground. Love wins y’all. Love always wins.

To The Allies:

I want to shift my attention back to being an ally for a second because I know there are quite a lot of people out there that identify themselves as straight LGBTQ+ allies but wear that label with conditions, accepting LGBTQ+ friends & family members, but only to a certain extent. Claiming acceptance & showing acceptance & the unconditional love that comes with it are two very different things. You cannot be accepting of someone you love & ask them to hide who they are or deny themselves in public in fear it would reflect badly upon you. You cannot be accepting of someone you love & not use their chosen name or pronouns. You cannot be accepting of someone you love & claim their sexuality is just a phase or that they’re too young to know. You cannot be accepting of someone you love & wish that down the road they would revert to the person you trained yourself to believe they were. You cannot be accepting of someone you love & not stand in solidarity with them when hate comes knocking at their door. You cannot be accepting of someone you love & then actively vote for those that would harm or put into place legislation that would undermine their rights to love whomever they chose or be whoever they want to be. Just because you don’t cut the people off you claim to love does not mean you accept them, it does not mean you are an ally. Just because you don’t kick out your kid or stop talking to your friend or spew hate back at them doesn’t mean you’re accepting of them. Not hating someone or isolating them should not be the standard for acceptance. Acceptance is embracing what makes them different, it’s taking the time to educate yourself on topics you may be completely oblivious to but you do so because you love that person. Acceptance is taking people at their word & trusting that they’re living their true self. Acceptance is asking people about their relationships in an open & interested way, it’s taking an interest in the person they love & putting in effort to form a bond. Acceptance is driving them to their doctors visits, being a pillar of encouragement & strength through their transition, & loving their new identity whole heartedly. It is your job as an LGBTQ+ ally to be a beacon of love in a world that so often hates them not to tell them to act straighter or conform to the societal norm.

To The LGBTQ+ Community:

To those who pray to God every night begging to have your identity taken away, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those that feel like their family’s “dirty little secret,” like your identity or who you love gets swept under the rug, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those living on the street because the people that claimed to love you wouldn’t accept you, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those that feel like they’ll never be able to live their true self, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those who are fighting with feeling like they have to choose their family & friends or themselves, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those who are picked on, bullied, rejected, fired, assaulted, or abused just because you’re different, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those trying desperately to shift self loathing into love, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those hesitant to drape the pride flag around their shoulders in fear of physical or emotional violence, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those that feel the world has turned its back on them, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those that never feel like they’ve been represented properly in media, I stand in solidarity with you.

To those desperately searching for love & acceptance, I stand in solidarity with you.

To the millions of marginalized humans around the globe, I stand in solidarity with you.

To the millions that would rather die than be who they are, I stand in solidarity with you.

To the outcasts, the unwanted, the rebels, the dreamer.

To the different, the beautiful, the unique, the defiant.

To the marchers, the activists, the lovers, the fighters.

I stand in solidarity with you.

Love is love. Love will always win. Keep pushing on, keep being strong, & keep fighting for a better tomorrow.